A covenant is the way agreements were made by people back when the scriptures was written. Culture tends to change and adapt over time and so today what we do for marriage is a far cry from what the scripture describes. In this case I think we have traded in a good thing for a poor substitute. Notice that Businesses use contracts all the time to get agreements with everyone they do business with. Most of us just sign without reading, not caring that what we have consented to can and will be held against us.
How was a covenant made.
Since it was an agreement between two parties or groups, there was a common format that was adopted and used.
- Introduction of the one making/initiating the covenant. In the scriptures The Almighty was usually the one making these covenants. He would establish His credibility and His record of achievement. As He did in Joshua 24 v 2.
- Then there would be an historical account of His dealings with the people he was about to come into covenant with. Joshua 24 v 2-13.
- A proposal which outlined terms and conditions.
- A critical component was boundaries/laws/commandments. What was expected of the other party was clearly outlined and what would happen if the expectation was not met.Joshua 24 v 14,15.
- Which were worded as blessings and curses/ consequences. Joshua 24 v 19-20
- Witnesses
- A sign or mark such as blood as proof of the commitment of both parties.
Hebrew marriages
The parents of the groom makes a proposal to the parents of the bride, to which both children agree when they are of age. A bride price and a dowry are discussed. The responsibility of both parties are clearly defined and agreed upon. An agreement as signed and they are betrothed. they then prepare to fulfill their obligation and when The Groom has made the necessary preparation, he comes for the bride at which time an elaborate ceremony is held. Witnesses are invited and the groom consummates the covenant and the bloody sheet is displayed as a sign of the covenant.
The breaking of the hymen was the seal that made the covenant valid. If there was no blood then the covenant was null and void as this meant the bride had been unfaithful and had broken the covenant already. All these checks and balances helped marriages to be more secure. In the case of Adam The Almighty himself chose his wife, standing in place of His parents. The Most High is willing and able to divinely connect us with a suitable partner. He also helped Abraham’s servant to choose Rebekah for Issac. Most of us are not equipped to make a wise choice, unless we get righteous council.
Fresh Flower Bouquets OnlineThe Modern Marriage is neither a covenant nor a vow
The only similarity to the old covenant is the proposal. But whereas the proposal in the scripture had details of terms and conditions usually this one is ” Will you marry me?” There is no discussion between parents, no description of duties and responsibilities. No financial accountability. No boundaries. The planning of the wedding takes precedence over the planning of the marriage. Then a government predetermined vow is spoken “I, ____, take you, ____, to be my wife (or husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part, according to God’s holy law, and this is my solemn vow.”
Note that both people are speaking for each other instead of for themselves alone. This in itself is problematic. A vow is usually worded to have each person promise what they will do and what they expect the other person to do in return. Hannah made a vow that if The Almighty gave her a son then she would give him back to Him. Today we have imaginary standards that were never agreed upon or decided by the parties involved. What is repeated by most people today when they get married. is neither a vow nor a covenant by the bible’s standards.
How did The Government get so involved
Isreal was a theocratic nation that took instructions from The Most High. Marriage covenants were made between families and the two people getting married. The government intervened in order to regulate who could marry who. In order to maintain power and quash division. They worded the vows to force compliance and it had no similarity to what the scripture described. Not even The Most High doesn’t force compliance. He allows us to choose to agree and to opt out if we want to.
“And if you faithfully obey the voice of Yah/ the Lord your Almighty/God, being careful to do all his commandments that I command you today, the Yah/Lord your Almighty/ God will set you high above all the nations of the earth. 2 And all these blessings shall come upon you and overtake you, if you obey the voice of Yah/ the Lord your Almighty/ God.
Deuteronomy 28 v 1-2
Another reason the Government got involved is for financial gain. They make A lot of money from license and from divorce decrees as well.
There were at least 6 covenants referenced in the scripture.
The Adamic covenant which was broken by Adam and Eve.
Covenant with Noah
Abrahamic covenant
Mosaic/ Isreal covenant which Isreal broke.
Covenant with David
Messianic or New covenant.
When made properly covenants protects the people in relationships
We have no control over anyone but ourselves and sometimes we don’t even have control over ourselves. We are therefore never required by The Almighty to control anyone else. Man however is always trying to do that.
Covenants provide a way to protect each persons rights and give them the option to hold the other party accountable if they violate the terms of the covenant. Nothing more and nothing less. Most people would never go into business with other people without a lawyer and a contract. So why do we get married and make such a serious commitment without a contract or covenant. Love requires freedom to be real. If people are forced to stay then is that really love? When agreements are violated and people are not held accountable then there really is no more agreement. At least not the original one. What you have done is to rewrite a new one with no boundaries.
Love at least the authentic genuine kind is a very precious commodity and it should be protected by covenant. If The Almighty protected His love with a covenant then why shouldn’t we? The modern day Jewish wedding comes the closest to a real covenant. A ketubah is written that outlines the agreement that is being made between the bride and the groom and it is signed on the day of the marriage and framed and kept in their home.